|
Issue: How to learn to be happy with what happens. Convenor: Mikk Sarv Participants: Fremy Cesar(Tahiti), John Engle(Tahiti), Sheila Isakson(USA), Hannah Himan Pessah(Israel), Jessie Hsian(Taiwan), Thomas F. Berger(Germany), Gail West(Taiwan), Agneta Setterwall(Sweden), Peggy Hollman(USA), Gabriele Burkhardt( Germany), Michael Pannwitz(Germany), Mikk Sarv(Estonia). Summary of the meeting: The topic originated from likeness of the words happen and happy. Sheila ( USA) mentioned the impact of assumptions to happiness. One tends to get hold to what one is assuming. John (Tahiti) raised point: could one become happy, when violence happens? Violence is a sign, that someone got badly hold to ones assumptions and isn’t capable to let it go. Agneta (Sweden) turned us to discuss disappointment. One should compost one’s disappointments, until it is processed to become happy soil for new hope. It’s griefwork. Fremy (Tahiti) refered to four principles, which help to decide, how to guide oneself and to handle the disappointment. He also mentioned the slogan in Haiti: Jan li pase li pase, JPP – whatever happens is what happens. It is usually said about street demonstrations and violence in Tahiti and one has to be careful while presenting there the principle “whatever happens is the right thing.” Mikk(Estonia): how to learn to cope with situations like this? Are there some good practices, how to process disappointment? Gail (Taiwan): happiness is a high state, with celebrations and balloons. What we are here talking about is not about happiness, it is how to get to zero state, to peace, to balance. Peggy (USA): expectations, when they got not fulfilled, create irritation. Fremy: sometimes I am disappointed with my own disappointment. Expectations are too high. You have to realize that there are very different realities, you should train to develop a flexible spirit inside, other people's reality isn’t necessarily like yours. Thomas (Germany)The steps between happen and happiness could be understanding, accepting, agreeing, finding peace with the situation. Peggy: happening is more about doing, happiness is a state of being. Happiness is related to hope, happening to expectations. Hope is like breathing, aspiration and inspiration. Mikk: in Estonian language expectation and hope are the same word, lootus, which is related to the similar words for story and creation in our langugage. Both hope and expectation are source for new stories, which shape and create new realities. Gail: the sources of unhappiness after facilitating OS could be embarrassment, anger, vulnerability, fear. Unhappiness has a lot to do with ones vulnerability. In Taiwan we say: one looses face. Agneta: Peace negotiator from Sweden, mr Hans Blix said: "The nobel art of loosing face will one day save the human race." Hannah (Israel): My way of to be prepared to disappointment before facilitating OS is to share the responsibility, not to feel responsible to the outcome, to discuss beforehand with sponsors, to share the fears, to work with the worse possible scenarios. It creates inside multiple stories to be prepared for whatever comes out. Be responsible to a group, not for a group. Follow up: To learn to be happy with what happens requires spaciousness and love, readiness to loose one's face, expectations and importance, to be totally present at every moment. Becoming spacious happens through practice of peace and love and through expanding one's now. Take more time before facilitating OS, think back and forth at least one thousand years, like the First Nations in Canadian West Coast are teaching... The topic will be discussed further in Practice of Peace meeting, November 2003 in Seattle. OnlineComments: |
|
#REDIRECT OSonOSinSwenMark/HowToLearnToBeHappyWithWhatHappens |